Psychological safety
When we talk about emotional safety, we’re not talking about never arguing or always agreeing. That’s not realistic and it’s not healthy either. Emotional safety is closely related to psychological safety, which is the belief that one can be oneself and express their opinions and ideas without fear of negative consequences. Trust is important at all levels, from individual interactions to broader connections. It impacts teamwork, coordination, communication, and collaboration.
Have you ever been in a conversation where the other person looks at you as if you've got a second head? Their blank stare or confused expression makes you question whether you're even speaking English, let alone making sense. In those moments, it's easy to internalise their reaction and assume the communication breakdown lies with you.
Emotionally immature individuals often struggle to truly listen and understand perspectives that differ from their own. Their focus tends to be inward, often driven by a desire to avoid discomfort or accountability. When you're sharing something that requires them to step outside their comfort zone or acknowledge a different viewpoint, their defenses can go up. This can manifest as a glazed-over look, a quick dismissal, or a complete misinterpretation of your words.
In these situations, the problem isn't your communication style; it's their processing style. They're not truly invested in understanding you. Instead, their priority might be to get off the "hot seat" as quickly as possible, deflecting any discomfort or challenge.
Recognising this dynamic – the "two heads" stare as a symptom of someone else's processing challenges can be incredibly empowering. It allows you to shift the blame away from yourself and understand the true source of the communication breakdown. And that understanding is the first step towards building healthier boundaries and fostering more psychologically safe interactions.
Psychological safety thrives in an environment of mutual respect and a genuine willingness to understand each other. When one party is emotionally unavailable or unwilling to engage with an open mind, that safety is eroded. It leaves you feeling unheard, invalidated, and ultimately less likely to speak up in the future.
Emotional safety is the feeling that, even when things get tough, you won’t be shamed, mocked, or abandoned. It’s knowing you can be your full self without fear.
Here’s what emotional safety looks like in action:
Listening to understand, not just to respond
Validating each other’s feelings, even if you don’t agree
Respecting each other’s pace, especially with tough conversations
Apologising when you’ve hurt each other
Emotional safety is something we all deserve. Emotional safety isn’t built overnight. But every time you show up with empathy, every time you choose curiosity over criticism, you’re laying another brick.
Mental Health Support at Work: Key Resources
Offer employees pathways to better mental health: online therapy platforms, user-friendly mindfulness apps, and Mental Health First Aider training for peer support.
Talkspace: A well-known platform with a large network of therapists.
BetterHelp: One of the largest virtual therapy services globally.
BACP: is the professional association for members of the counselling professions in the UK.
These apps offer guided meditations, stress reduction techniques, sleep support, and other resources to promote mental well-being. Examples include:
